April Fools

It used to be that one day was sufficient for hoaxes and what passed as practical jokes.

However, it is now obvious that April Fools’ Day has become a daily permanent feature as the proliferation of “narishkeit” (Yiddish for foolishness) has reached pandemic proportions.

This particularly manifests itself when it encompasses Israel and Jews.

In fact, the level of admonitions and demands increases incrementally and what we are experiencing now borders on the absurd.

Some recent and current examples illustrate the prevailing insanity.

The United Nations Secretary General never fails to rise to the occasion. His antics are certainly not practical jokes, as he takes them very seriously and is completely mystified when Israel refuses to fall into line.

Speaking as Ramadan commenced, he asserted that “Ramadan is a time for spreading the values of compassion, community and peace. I am fasting with you. It is monstrous that Palestinians in Gaza are marking Ramadan with Israeli bombs still falling, bullets flying, artillery still pounding and humanitarian assistance still facing obstacles.”

Christians fasting for Ramadan may be a useful woke gesture of political correctness, but it ignores the stark reality that jihadist-inspired Islamists consider all “nonbelievers” worthy of perishing by the sword. The Secretary General’s explanation of this holy period, unfortunately, does not tally with the explosion of violence and mayhem which annually accompanies Ramadan. On top of everything else he fails to mention that Israeli actions in Gaza would cease immediately if the kidnapped hostages are released and Hamas terrorists eliminated.

The next April folly is the Biden Administration’s intention to build a pier off Gaza and put Qatar in charge of its operation. Qatar is a major supporter and funder of Hamas, and it does not take too much imagination to realize that with these two in cahoots, the opportunity for smuggling illegal and offensive material into Gaza will be too good to miss. The Americans maintain that Israel will be able to inspect the aid shipments but this sounds and looks like a forlorn exercise in futility. Can you imagine the uproar if Israel confiscates smuggled items? With existing tunnels destroyed the most logical means of restocking rockets and other weapons will be to bring them in via ships.

Has anyone in the State Department actually thought what might happen when terror groups decide to sabotage the pier facility? Who will safeguard it? Qatar? If Israel thwarts any terror attempt, the UN will convene and with righteous indignation censure it for blocking aid.

Meanwhile, back in the “land of the free”, a PEW survey of Muslims revealed some startling yet unexpected results. It showed that 49% of US Islamic followers believed that Hamas had valid reasons for attacking Israel on 7 October. In addition, 54% of respondents said that Israel had no right to defend itself against Hamas, and 68% said that Israel’s retaliation is not acceptable.

I suspect surveys in Europe, the UK, Canada, South Africa and Australia would yield fairly similar results. The warning bells for Jewish communities are ringing loud and clear.

As well as April fools doing their best to “overlook” those dedicated to anti-Israel activities and undisguised Jew hate, we have the phenomenon of fools rushing in to embrace obviously transparent deceit.

Take for example the latest confidence trick initiated by the PA President for life.

One of the biggest scandals conveniently swept under the carpet is the policy of rewarding terrorists and their families who murder Israelis. Amounting to millions of dollars from the “martyrs’ fund”, these astronomical amounts of incentive payments are seemingly no impediment to the international community’s patronage of a non-existent peace partner.

Lo and behold in an effort to befuddle and confuse all April fools the PA has supposedly proposed to change the criteria under which these payments are made. At the moment the amount paid for jailed terrorists is determined by the length of incarceration. It is now suggested that this category could be replaced by one of “financial need.”

Reportedly the US is “reviewing” this change to the payment criteria. One can almost hear the whoops of unmitigated joy at the State Department as they no doubt are working overtime to try and work out how to sell this charade. Instead of calling this suggested change a fraudulent attempt at deception and demanding the complete cessation of financial terror rewards, the frenetic folly of appeasing Palestinian Arab behavior continues. The question is whether the gullible left in Israel and elsewhere will be suckered into cheering this fraud.

Nations are now rushing to restore aid to UNRWA despite the UN agency’s clear cohabitation with Hamas.

The theme song of the Biden team is the messianic vision of a “revitalized” Palestinian Authority.

Apparently, cleansed of all corruption and with a zealous dedication to democratic values, human rights and religious tolerance this mythical outfit will usher in an era of universal brotherhood. It will, according to the hallucinatory mantras of Washington, also see current supporters of terror miraculously embrace the reality of historically legal Jewish sovereignty.

The Ramallah-based kleptocracy knows that all it has to do is waffle some great-sounding lies, and the international community will pressure Israel to accept the devious deceptions. It has happened before with resurrecting Arafat and his gang via Oslo and ethnically cleansing Jews from Gaza.

The desperate desire to implant another terror State in Israel’s heartland means that each and every poisoned chalice offered has to be grasped.

This explains the unrestrained expressions of glee when Abbas appointed a new Prime Minister and sold another tainted bill of goods. At first glance, a new unelected PM and new faces appointed to the PA cabinet is an appeaser’s delight. After all, what could be better than a so-called “revitalised” authority? That must be just what the doctors in Washington ordered.

Lo and behold, it has now been revealed by PMW that two ministers in this supposedly revitalised PA are far from squeaky clean. The new minister of religion is on record describing Jews as “apes and pigs” while the minister of women’s affairs is an unabashed supporter of terrorists. These revelations have not fazed those in charge at the US State Department. Blinken welcomed the new PA cabinet while his officials issued a statement saying that “a revitalised PA is essential to delivering results”.   

New Zealand’s Foreign Minister is visiting Egypt and the Arab League. According to news reports, “after talking to Egyptian and Arab League officials, Winston Peters now has gained a richer understanding about achieving a sustainable two-state solution.” His demand for an immediate Gaza ceasefire made no mention for the unconditional release of Israeli hostages kidnapped by Hamas. The other glaringly obvious fact is that he is not visiting Israel. Wouldn’t you think that he might have gone there in order “to gain a richer understanding” of what establishing a terror entity in the midst of Israel would entail? His understanding of reality might also be improved by visiting the scenes of the 7 October pogroms. It is merely another example of not wanting to be confused by the facts and preferring to join in mouthing the inanities so beloved of most UN members.

April has only just started and already the fools are rushing in.

You can fool some of the people all the time and all of the people some of the time but you cannot fool all of the people all of the time.

Michael Kuttner is a Jewish New Zealander who for many years was actively involved with various communal organisations connected to Judaism and Israel. He now lives in Israel and is J-Wire’s correspondent in the region.